Archive | September 13, 2012

To Every Morning Show Host, Everywhere.

Hi. I’m Sarah. In most cases, I’m your target demographic.

Let me tell you a little something.

I appreciate that you have a female co-host because, hey, I’m a woman and you’re trying to earn my drive time. I appreciate that you consider her the yin to your yang, the estrogen to your testosterone. I appreciate these things.

But you know? Women are, in general, pretty smart creatures. I feel comfortable making that generalization. Sure, we have the exceptions – OctoMom and Tanning Mom are a few recent not-so-stellar examples – but on the whole, we’re okay. I worked in radio for years and I feel comfortable saying that women in radio are pretty smart too.

So you should let them be that way.

It is a particular thorn in my side that every local morning show I have access to here has a female cohost. And that’s not the rub. The problem lies in the fact that her job is 1) to tell the time and weather after every break, 2) to laugh uproariously at her host and 3) to titter and giggle about “womanly” things.

I was scanning through on a drive to work this week and I heard the host slam another show – the syndicated show which his morning show replaced – and his version of slamming it included mocking their female cohost.

Um, sweetheart. Bob & Sheri may have not been local, but Sheri was a GODSEND to radio. She is quick, funny, admittedly dysfunctional, and (LORD FORBID) female. She talks about sex. She is open about her failures in life. She has kids and tells funny stories about them. She is AWESOME.

And by the way – new LOCAL morning show – prank calling folks for two hours is very 1985. You know why that format didn’t stick around? Because it purposefully makes someone the butt of your jokes. That’s a really shitty way to start someone’s day. It’s uncomfortable for the listener. It’s downright mean.

Oh, also. Say what you will about Sheri, but she does more than obnoxiously laugh and then hock diet drugs three times every commercial break.

So, guys. Us women? We came equipped with more than ovaries and boobs. We have brains too. And it doesn’t lessen your manhood to let a woman spar with you. And if she can’t hold her own in a spar with you? It’s not a good fit. And it’s not fun to listen to. Move her to the afternoon shift and try another cohost.

And for PETE’S SAKE. Stop the stupid prank calls. They weren’t even funny in ’85.

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