So – does your house have chores? Stupid question, Sarah. OF COURSE YOUR HOUSE HAS CHORES. My question is – how do you delineate who does which chore? Do you have a routine? DOES YOUR SPOUSE SUCK AT CHORES?
We don’t have a set routine when it comes to chores, but there are some UNDERSTOOD assignments. 1) I cannot clean the litter box because I was pregnant once, about four years ago, so this is Bryan’s chore. I know, I know, those of you who say I am no longer pregnant and therefore there is no danger – BUT YOU ARE WRONG AND CAT POOP IS GROSS. 2) Whomever cooked shall not do the dishes.
I want to talk about #2 right there. (The chore #2, not the function #2, cat or otherwise.) See, this is where we have a fundamental difference in our approach. When I say “Do the dishes”, I mean, “Rinse all dishes and put in dishwasher and then clean up the area in which the cooking and/or eating occurred.” I do not mean “Put some dishes away and leave others ‘to soak’ until Sarah can’t look at them anymore and just does them herself”, but this is somehow what Bryan perceives.
I don’t blame him for this, because I know it’s one of my OCD ticks, and he does not suffer as I do. But still. When he says he’s “done the dishes” and I see dishes “soaking” all over the place and there’s still food particles all over the stove and/or counter, I smile at him as you would a small child, and just end up doing it my damn self.
NOW. I know that sounds awful and like I’m criticizing my husband here on the internet (which .. okay, yeah, I am), but I know I do the same thing. I am HORRIBLÈ (like, french-bad) at completing laundry duty. I’m actually really good at getting laundry into the washer and even turning the washer on, but after that? I CANNOT BE BOTHERED. I know, I know, that is so stupid, but it’s true. Getting it out of the dryer (if I manage to get it in) and putting the laundry away? CANNOT BE BOTHERED. OH, I hate it so so much. If I get the clean clothes back into my room, guess where they go? GUESS? If you answered “In a pile by Sarah’s closet”, you win! Hooray for you! (My husband HATES that. The pile. Oh, it grates on him.)
It’s just .. my clothes are so cooommmplicated. They have to be huuuunnng uuuuup. And I don’t waaaannnnnaa.
(In my defense, if I do Tony’s laundry? It’s put away within a day.)(And I am the only one, for some reason, who can put Tony’s laundry away.)
So it’s not just me, and it’s not just Bryan. Do you guys have chores that your spouse doesn’t do ALL THE WAY? (Or, okay, that maybe YOU don’t do?)(Or if you totally just want to bitch about your spouse, cool too.)(I’m here for you.)