Y’all, for real. I know that CommentLuv has been screwing all of y’all over, but you know what? I HAVE NO IDEA HOW TO UPGRADE. Yes, it’s true. I am a moron in an engineer’s velcro shoes.
It keeps asking me to Automatically Upgrade?, and I’m all, YEAH, DO THAT SHIT FOR ME, but you know what? I CAN’T. It asks me for my login info, which I faithfully and blindly hand over (aside: is this stupid of me?), and it FAILS TO CONNECT WITH BLAHBLAHBLAH. At which point I start chewing my gum even harder, as if this will stimulate my brain cells into making sense of this fantastical language that WP 2.7 is spewing in my general direction.
She’s been blogging since 2004? REALLY?! And she can’t upgrade her plugins?! Oh, har de har har, let’s all laugh and point and mock her out-of-date plugins.
It is points like this in life that I realize: I do not drink nearly enough.
I am pretty much self-taught when it comes to code (read: idiot savant wannabe), so I only know the basics. I know how to track and block IP addresses.. a feature I use more often than any other.. and I know how to capture screenshots of repeated attempts to access my site by an unwanted visitor.. and I know how to create sidebar items like current productions that I want the world to know.. but other than that? Yeah. Even “Blogging for Dummies” is over my head.
I like to think that this makes me the everywoman’s poster child for blogging. I can do it, so can you! You can be half a fucktard and still write a blog! (Not that you needed ME to point that out.)
I hate it when I feel like technology is advancing ahead of me. I had this same realization yesterday while playing Wii with my stepson, who knew every secret and turn and code before we even knew there was a need for one. And I was all longing for the two buttons of the Nintendo, when your biggest challenge was merely avoiding those pesky flying turtles. My stepson? Was playing GameCube games on his Wii and declaring them “old school”.
I imagine that Binja will dismantle and reassemble a Rubik’s Cube before too long. While I try and get the child-proof cap off of my arthritis medicine.
Well, it’s nearing on 4:30, so I’d better hobble on down to the buffet so I can get my early-bird discount before the riff-raff takes it over. Damn kids always take all of the mashed potatoes, and rarely even eat them. I need those potatoes for my gums!
In other news today, I announced I was 28 today in a hallway after my hip popped so loudly that someone DOWN THE HALL turned around to see who had fired a gun, and everyone within earshot said, “You’re only HOW old?”
I guess it’s all relative.