Archive | April, 2007

I Would’ve Wet My Pants.

OHMYGOD.  I totally neglected to share with you one of the most awesome experiences I have ever been privilaged enough to witness: I watched a man come-of-age.  And become a god.

First of all, lemme say that I have known this man since he was the gawky teenager who decided to be a techie when he didn’t have anything else to do.  He came to a party at the Bitter House once (with someone we did not invite), and he was actually kind of funny.  I watched him and thought, “Well, look at him, all growin’ up.”

Next thing I knew, he was married.  And then there was a baby.  So I figured, “Man, he grew up FAST.”

But then he was a spot operator for Pinocchio.  And he wore Heeleys (the shoes I hate) and drove a motorcycle.  So I was kinda torn.  Grown up?  Or Not?

Dude.  He so kicked my ass with this.

Saturday night, we all met at the Debil’s house for an adult party.  We were SO excited to not have children around, after the horrid weekend we’d suffered through.  And in walks ManBoy, motorcycle helmet in hand, with two boys we had never seen before.  He politely asked the hostess if she had any cleaning supplies.  She nods, looking over the two unknowns.

Then ManBoy comes out with it: these two teens had egged his bike and our sound guy’s car.  AND THEY WENT AFTER THEM, TERRORIZED THEM, MADE THEM CALL THEIR PARENTS, AND WOULD NOW MAKE THEM WASH THE VEHICLES AT 10 AT NIGHT.

It was awesome.  Totally awesome.  The teens trembled in the house, where ManBoy never lost his cool.  His voice was always steady, but he gave the impression that one false step would result in a serious ass-kicking.

And the crowning glory?  Ready?  He made the boys give him their cell phone numbers, father’s cell phone numbers, and addresses.  And they had half an hour to get home.  He was calling in twenty minutes to speak to their father.  If they didn’t hand the phone over, he was calling or coming over. 

I. Was. In. Awe.

So kudos to ManBoy, who has since totally become MAN THAT RULES THE BOYS.  It truly, truly made my night.

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Around 10 Weeks

It’s time for another pregnancy update.  I know you’re excited.  I sure am.

Lil Peep was actually very good through most of this weekend.  Peep finally had had enough yesterday, and I suffered from mild cramps most of the day. (The books say it’s common if there’s no bleeding and the pain is no worse than your menstual cramps.)  Of course, this had Bryan and I worried.  Lil Peep is apparently not the stage whore we are.

This morning, I am suffering from an exhaustion I can’t articulate.  Granted, we just did 7 shows in four days, which is a lot for anyone, but I’m dragging ass this morning. 

Last night, we had coconut soup with shrimp.  Which, quite honestly, may have been the best thing I’ve eaten since I got all knocked up.

My weight has pretty much leveled at this point.  While I had been fluctuating between 3-8 lbs a day, I’m now just waivering between 1 and 2.  And now that we have our lives back, I can eat like a normal person. (This means I’ll cook instead of driving through somewhere.  Blech.)

I’m so glad the show’s over, but mostly because I’m proud of what came out of it.  We had a great time together, we met some great people, and we had tons of fun with old friends.  Kari dove into makeup with both feet (and was FABULOUS!), Bryan hit the stage (literally), and Kevin and I got to just be our amazing selves.  If the director ever watched it, I’m sure he’d have been proud. 🙂

Today is a day that I hate being “in the pregnancy closet” at work, though, because I could sure use a nap.  Or a lax day.  But we’re gearing up for a hectic month (yes, I said month), so if I can JUST make it until June..

I have a Coven dinner to look forward to for Cinco de Mayo!

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I don’t know the right answer in this situation.  I do, however, feel badly for everyone involved.

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The Low Down from the Momma

I’m about to give you a big one for the “Sarah is such a HORRIBLE person” category.  I know you’re excited.

Here’s the lowdown: I’m not excited about my pregnancy.

Don’t misunderstand.  I am very much looking forward to being a mother.  I can’t wait to do nursery stuff.  But am I excited?  About being bloated, constipated, gaining weight, and not sleeping?  No, quite frankly, I’m not.

And I know that comes across as callous.  Which is why when people gush and beam and ask me questions, I will put on some fake-happy-grin and say, “Yes, we’re very excited!”

That’s half true.  Bryan is excited.

Does this make me horrible?

I don’t FEEL any different.  I mean, I feel ill from time to time, and I hate how my weight fluctuates with the frequency of my bowel movements, and it’s weird to only crave healthy food.. but I don’t feel PREGNANT.  At all.  I just feel.. you know, like Sarah.

And I feel like I disappoint all of the people who want stories of flutters and how I lie awake and dream about our baby.  Because I don’t get flutters and I don’t have those dreams.  Last night, in fact, I dreamt that I couldn’t get on to a classified system that I desperately needed something from.  THOSE are my dreams.  No baby.  None.

I worry that this means I’ll be a horrible mother.  But I only worry about that for a second, because.. DUR.  I felt this same way about my wedding, leading up to it.  People kept saying, “Aren’t you excited?”  Well, we were already living together (albeit, in sin), so there wasn’t that much change coming my way.  We were good before, we are good now.  I feel the same way about the baby. (Although, yes, I know there is a MAJOR change coming my way.)

Even seeing the ultrasound, LIVE, didn’t help.  I was fascinated by it, in a way that you might be fascinated by watching a live surgery, but surely that heartbeat is not in MY belly.

And this all brings on stupid guilt and even stupider fears.  Am I going to miscarry if I just don’t care enough?  I’m eating right, sleeping plenty, and taking my vitamins.  If I just don’t dote over it every single minute, will God deem me unworthy?

Teddie eased my mind at Book Club.  She said she felt that way through the WHOLE pregnancy (and she has a fabulous daughter).  She said even when they brought her the baby, she held the baby and thought briefly, “Look!  Someone had a beautiful baby!” before it sank in that it was HER baby.

So there’s my deep, dark secret.  Stupid shit that you worry about when you’re trying to sustain a life that you can’t feel.

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Happy Daisy Day!

Today was a good day.

After the long night, I thought I would be dragging today, but a large Hi-C is keeping me strong.  I got a call around 10:45 that I had a delivery at the Visitor’s Center.

I stopped there on my way to let Mom’s dogs out at lunch, and lo and behold.. there is a pretty arrangement of daisies waiting for me. 

It’s Administrative Professionals Day.

In my three years with this company (and the two as a temp before it), I have never, ever been recognized on Admin Pro Day.  I have often coordinated other people’s gifts and cards and lunches, but this is the first time someone has thanked ME.

This year caught me especially off-guard because my new job code doesn’t necessarily scream “Administrative Professional”.  But the team said I’m their “gal Friday”.  They can’t get by without me.

I know I’m a bit hormonal right now, but that meant a lot to me.

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