Archive | May, 2006

Taking a Moment

“I just want a block of time to spend.. you know, I hate to sound cheesy, but I just want a block of time to spend with you.  Just a bunch of free time that we’re not obligated to do anything, and we can look back and say, ‘Man, that was a good month.’  You know?”

Yes, baby, I know.

We chatted on the phone, as is really the only time we talk as of late.  I said, “You know, I’m probably not going to get to see you next week.”

He sighed.  “Oh, you know the week after that is tech week for me..”

Jesus God. 

On the flip side, I’m very excited about my role in Seussical.  I got to see some basic set drawings last night, and if that’s not exciting enough.. I get a grand staircase.  She said they may not use it for anything else, but by God, I was gonna get one.  I told her my overwhelming joy of peaking at 25 by having a song dedicated to my ass (tail, whatever), and she agreed: this is gonna be great. 

Oooh, speaking of which, we need painters.  That’s the only tech end she hasn’t sewn up yet.  I thought, hmmm… one of my VERY good friend has parents who are masterful painters..

Went and did some real estate business today.  I love it when men naturally assume I’m going to bend.  This man actually told Bryan that I spoke awfully tough.  Yes, honey.  I do.  Bring it.

But the good news.. the BEST news.. is that he will let us move stuff in the week before the July weekend, so #1: we can clean the old house and leave it pristine condition and #2.. oh, how I love #2.. we can still take the Coven trip to the beach.  Hallelujah, praise the lord.  You can’t possibly conceive how much I need that weekend.

Daddy and I are emailing.  I called him a diva.  He said he should be called a divo.  Now I’ve got “Whip It” stuck in my head. 

Matthew Philip Kincaid.  It’s a lovely name.  Meant for a prince. 🙂

I’m going to call him “that damn baby”.  That’s my nickname for him.

It has just been a maddening couple of weeks.  Something will give eventually.

Y’all just pray it’s not anyone’s skull.

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God, yesterday just SUCKED.  Like, horribly.

And what really sucked about it was the fact that people were making things FAR more difficult than they have to be.  When things got mucked up, they wanted to point fingers, to yell, to blame.. and that fixes NOTHING.  So let’s all just take a minute, admit that things got mucked up (no matter who’s to blame.. especially since it wasn’t ME), and fix it.  Together.  Calmly.  As adults.

So I took most of my day yesterday to absorb all of the anger, the blame, and the finger pointing and basically tried to pacify everyone.  That is SO exhausting.  But, today, things are looking up.  Everyone is happier.  Everything is moving at a better pace.

There is a lady that I work with whom I adore.  She is the sweetest lady, but sometimes, she can make my life so incredibly difficult.  Things that don’t take me long to do, or that I have my own process for doing, she will spend three times as much effort and time performing.  It’s just frustrating.  I finally came to realize last night that she makes such a loud fuss over things because she really doesn’t know how to do them.  She’s lost.  And, like I left on my xanga, “The ship whose horn is bellowing the loudest is usually the captain that’s lost in a fog.”

It was a VERY long day.  To cheer myself up between beatings, I went for a little retail therapy.  That made me feel a little better.  Then I went for my next beating at Debbie’s house.

I felt like The Whipping Boy.

I finally got home around 9 p.m.  I was exhausted.  I called Delle, to inform her of the status of the beating, and around 10:15, got off the phone.  It was just one of those days where I was drained.  I hate that.  I like to think of myself as unstoppable and never-ending, but yesterday, there was nothing left.  Bryan came home from build and I just couldn’t even talk.  I had nothing.  He crouched behind me on the couch and rubbed my shoulders, and all I could put together was “Thank you,” which I repeated a dozen times.  I couldn’t stop saying it.  And I realized that maybe I need a break.

So, September is my break month.  I’m booked through August, but September, I’m doing nothing.  I am planning a wedding and doing nothing else.  I will be home every night, unless I’m out doing something I want to do and am not obligated to do.  And I made Bryan promise last night that we would not do any Christmas shows this year.

I remember when all of this was fun.  And I’m finding fun stuff that I want to do (I can’t WAIT for Steph’s ASL class to start; I ordered my book last night!).  But I need to have free time again.  I need to not have shows lined up three months in advance.  I need to be at home with my husband.

I am almost hesitant to put this in writing, because I will no doubt be eating my words come September. 🙂

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15 a.m.

It’s just one of those days when everyone is yelling and saying I dropped the ball.. when no balls have been dropped.  I just want to scream at the top of my lungs for EVERYONE to GETTHEHELLOFFMYBACK. 

Everything will turn out fine.  I just need you to trust that, and let me be. 

Or, should that be too much to ask, handle it your damn self.

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The Real Thang

Alrighty, guys.  Blogspirit is down until "15 am" for maintenance, and since I don’t understand when the hell 15 a.m. is, I had to figure out if there were alternate ways of posting.  In my ever-expanding prowess of technology, I figured it out.  Hooray for Sarah.

Sarah needs some hoorays today.  I am feeling stretched thin today.  With no light at the end of the tunnel.  And, you know, life just doesn’t have to be SO DAMN HARD.

That’s all I have to say about that.

Had a FANTASTIC weekend!  Got to go out of town, had fun with The Boy, and ended it all with a wonderful barbeque at Steph’s house with the Coven.  The Boy and BB played happily, Scout sang for us quite a bit, and it was nice.

Now, some final preparations for Delle’s baby shower, and The Boy’s birthday is also this week, and we’re working on moving houses.  Throw an upcoming wedding and two shows in there, and I’m about cooked.

Again, life can be so much easier.. so I hear..

Today is National Grump-Out Day.  I am totally celebrating.

Wait, no.. THREE shows. 

You know what I miss?  Ephedra. 

That’s all for now.  I’ll write more around 15 a.m.
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.. this is ONLY a test.


If it were an actual post, you would hear the frenzied whispers of gossipers all over Huntsville.


But relax, this is only a test.  That is all.


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