Me: Did you want to date me because you thought I was easy?
Bryan: No. I had no idea you were easy when I met you.
Me: Yeah, thanks.
Bryan: You were the most beautiful woman I’d ever seen. You had stage presence I hadn’t seen in this town. You were witty and funny. And dressed like that pirate wench? Wow. Your banter, your cleverness.. even the cadence of your voice. Everything about you was .. it just took my breath away.
Me: Aww, Bryan..
Bryan: You being easy was just a bonus.
This conversation makes light of something that really got under my skin last night. See, it’s no secret that I am a woman. And to that end, I ENJOY being a woman. I am comfortable in my own skin, always have been, and I was pretty open about sex and all that comes with it. I still am, to a certain degree.Â
Because of this, men often find solace in putting blame on me, when it doesn’t belong there. They can do this just out of infering that time spent with me is used for unclean purposes, or they can blatantly lie about it. They figure that all who hear this will think, “Well, it doesn’t sound true.. but hey, it was Sarah, so who knows what really happened?”
It’s not uncommon that I run into these rumors, sometimes years after they’ve started. Most of the time they make me laugh, because let’s be honest, I wouldn’t waste my saliva on those men.
But rarely, something will wound.
I don’t think men understand how strongly their words stand. I’m not sure that they realize that assigning a scarlet letter is not something that’s easily undone. And making accusations, when I have held my tongue for years about the truth, is not only childish and cowardly, but it makes me doubt that I ever truly knew you.
And that’s all I have to say about that. I am owed an apology, and I stupidly thought it was my fault.Â
You tasted like beer and cigarettes, and I cried when I pulled away from your house because a trust had been violated without my consent. And I forgave you that.
Wow, this spiraled a bit out of control here, didn’t it?
It’s a Friday morning, and it’s sleeting outside. That’s all from my end.
The truth is an illsusive little bitch. It has always amazed me how an ignorant person will put out grandiose lies based on a grain of truth and think it’s ok. I got a lawyer involved over just such a grade school event. Yours, however is even more of a betrayal. You could have easily come out with the truth and made him look like the slime he is, but you took the high ground.
I’m sorry honey. I know it sucks when somehing you’re proud of is turned into a lie and spread around like last month’s fertilizer. It also sucks that we thought he was the innocent in everything going on. Lie with dogs and you’ll become a bitch.