Self-important actresses drive me bonkers.

You might wonder why I’ve been on this kick lately.  I’ve written about stage-etiquette and theatre-manners and just general courtesies quite a bit recently, and I’m sure everyone has their own conjecture as to why I’ve been stuck on this topic.

It’s been a few events.  But there’s one that’s stuck in my crawl.

I remember being a senior in high school, I really do.  And I remember being a junior, when Delle was a senior.  I remember how we were both TERRORS our senior year.  Holy hell.  There’s this feeling of accomplishment and you think that the school OWES you for your four years of hard work.. and all of these feelings are undeserved.  I know this.. now.

My senior year is when I began the "Do your job" thing.  I began it with Viv.. which was a mistake.  We got into an argument one day because she wouldn’t play through an audition piece of mine.  I told her THAT’S HER JOB.. AND I NEED HER TO DO HER JOB.  She said she didn’t HAVE to help me with my scholarship auditions.  I said, very harshly, "
Yes, you do.  That’s YOUR JOB."  She still reminds me about it to this day.  And as it turns out, we were both wrong.

She didn’t HAVE to.  She should have wanted to, but she didn’t HAVE to do anything.  I was lucky I had a teacher who could play for me at all.  And I was privilaged enough to be taken to vocal scholarship auditions. 

See, there are some seniors in Bryan’s program who feel that they’ve EARNED everything they want.  And I think it bugs me because I didn’t realize it in time, and it held me back from a lot of fun things.  I spent so much time brooding over not being coddled and adored and oohed and awwed over that I stopped having fun.  It wasn’t until April before I stopped feeling taken advantage of and started letting loose.  And ask anyone who saw me on stage before and after that transition.. and they will confirm that my performance improved ten-fold.  As soon as I stopped taking myself so damn seriously, and stopped being angry that no one else would either, I became quite animated.  And that makes a better actress.

Another thing: you are cast based on what you present.  If you walk in, put on your audition sheet that you HATE a certain part, and if you refuse to do something the director asks you to at auditions, you are lucky to be cast at all.  I would NEVER cast anyone who sees themselves so narrowly, and was unbending at AUDITIONS.. what did I have to look forward to in rehearsals.  So being upset that you didn’t get the part you wanted is NOT the right attitude.. being grateful you were allowed to participate at all is the way to go.

And sometimes, we are cast on things we didn’t even know.  For instance, my senior year, we did "Hello, Dolly".  I wanted to be Dolly so badly I could scream.  Dolly was a low-alto (perfect!), she was animated (perfect!), she was fast-talking (perfect!).  But I wasn’t cast as Dolly; I was cast as Irene Molloy, the ingenue.  BORING.  But when the girl cast as Dolly and I sat in Viv’s office, trying to get a handle on this very odd casting, Viv asked us both to hold up our hands.  We did so, not understanding.  There, simply in how we held our hands, is why we were cast the way we were.  Sam (the girl who played Dolly) held her hand up strongly, fingers spread, energy pulsing.  Mine was a graceful, fingers curved, ballet-type hand.  We had no clue, but we understood.  She saw that.. and we had to trust her.

So if you didn’t get the part you wanted, it may be the biggest break you’ll get.  It will be challenging, because you’ll have to find something to love in the character.  But think of the growth!  And if you CAN’T get past it, pull out and shut the hell up.