Today, I had to tell a man I was gay so he’d leave me alone.

And then he came back.  Ten minutes later.

He’s been back several times since then.

I showed him my photo booth pics of Bryan and I.  Said that was my boyfriend.

Which blew my cover, cause then he knew I lied about the gay thing.

I told him after I caught genital herpes from my lesbian lover, I left her.  Because she was clearly cheating on me.

He said I deserved better.

Guys, what’s the biggest turn-off?