So I had this fantastical dream last night that was really not as fantastical as it could have been, but it was worth noting:

Dane Cook was doing a campus tour and came around to Montevallo.  Although I’ve been away from there for some six odd years and Bryan even longer, we both competed for this "Spend the Day with Dane" contest.  I WON.  So I used my amazing skills, and of course Dane took me back to his room where things progressed.. naturally..

My shirt was totally off and he was a MAH-VELOUS kisser and things were moving down the right path when these girls come in.  Stupid groupie girls. (Cause I am not a groupie.  I am a FAN.)  They were all like, "Where’s Dane?  We heard Dane is in here.."

AND DANE TURNS TO ME AND SAYS, "HARPER, PUT YOUR SHIRT BACK ON."

I just looked at him.  Because, well.. you know.. Harper is NOT my name.

He says it again, as he gets up to greet these groupies.. "Harper, put your shirt back on."

And then I thought, "Hell, he can call me whomever he wants to.  That’s Dane F*ckin Cook right there."