So Friday night, there was an incident at Kroger’s.

I should’ve known better than to go grocery shopping on a Friday night.  Truly.  Not only was it FREEZING outside, but what crazies go to a grocery store on a Friday night?

Well, lemme tell you what crazies.

There was a girl who had lost her mind at Kroger’s.  I should’ve thought twice when I pulled up and there were four (count them, 4) police cars in the parking lot.  I just thought maybe THEY were doing their shopping too.  DUR.

So I walk in, and I can hear her from the doorway.  She is randomly wandering the store, shouting and crying, and knocking entire shelves over.  The cops kept her surrounded at all times, but were scared to touch her.  She was complaining loudly about some “him” who had wronged her.  It really was to the point that you had to glance down the aisle before you ventured in, just to be sure that there wasn’t a crazy waiting for you while you were shopping for Corn Pops.

And it irritated me, that this crazy lady had free reign of my grocery store.  She yelled and made a mess and generally was ballistic, and the cops just made sure she didn’t harm others.  At one point, we were in the same aisle, and I was silently daring her to approach me.  Maybe the cops wouldn’t touch her, but I was LOOKING for a reason.

Either way, I made it out unscathed.

Another crazy incident was witness on Judge Joe Brown.  Bryan indulges my obsession with bad court tv and we watch close to 2 hours daily of bad courtroom drama.  Sometimes, though, it pays off.. as was the case on the last show we watched.  Ladies, prepare to turn four shades of ill.

So this plaintiff comes in and is suing for unpaid medical bills due to an incident that occurred during a “Ladies Only” party.  This particular lady, also a dancer herself, was escorted onstage to participate in a dance with a male dancer.  She noted that she was a good 60 pounds heavier than the male dancer (who was a teeny little man), and she whispered to him not to try and pick her up.  He didn’t listen, and hoisted her thighs over his shoulder.  From that point, he lowered his jaw into her crotch and proceeded to bite the crotch of her jeans, and attempted to pick her up with his teeth.  After he finished the rest of the dance, she noticed she was bleeding.  Why?  “He bit off a piece of my cookie.”

I warned you.

Anyway, she won her case.  Because who in their right mind would argue?

That’s really all I’ve got for now.  Rehearsals are running, and many thanks to our TD for grabbing me some Starbucks last night.  That was a blessing, you have no idea.  Also many thanks to our lighting designer, for stepping in and smiling the whole time.  Can’t wait to open, can’t wait to close.