Tony moved up to “the big class” a couple of weeks ago. He has been OVER THE MOON about it, and so have we, because the teacher in there is one of those skilled teachers who just exudes calm. Even with the largest class in the school, and the same class of rowdy boys Tony’s always been a part of, the class is just quiet and focused. It is something to behold.
First Day of Pre-K
(The picture is blurry because 1) I was hurried and 2) I WAS CRYING SO EVERYTHING WAS BLURRY.)
I dropped him off at school one morning a week or so ago and his teacher told me how he was such a calm, focused child. Which, coming from her, was an AWESOME compliment. “He’s really big into routines,” she said. I nodded and beamed, Yep, that’s my boy! Happy to have a routine. “He’s great in routine,” she said, “but he gets a little out of sorts when we’re not in routine.”
I KNEW THIS WOULD HAPPEN. I KNEW I WOULD BREAK MY CHILD.
I kid. A little. We are those parents, though, and I wondered if there would be a downside to it. We are the parents who are home by the little one’s bedtime, who just avoid social outings if they run later than dark, who schedule around naptime. We are those parents. And thus far? I would swear that I would do it all the same way again.
Upsides: he’s a GREAT sleeper. He’s loads more independent, knowing what routine lays ahead of him. (He makes his own bed, dresses himself daily, and cleans up his room. Because that’s just what we do.)
Downsides: Um, this last week is a great example.
So, I took his teacher’s advice to heart. It’s summer, and it’s Tony’s summer too, and so we’ve started .. experimenting a little. Bedtimes are later, naptimes are sometimes non-existent. We’ve stayed out till 9 or 10 p.m. a couple of times this last week – sometimes even on school nights – and skipped our bedtime routines.
.. it .. is .. not going so well.
Thursday night brought a visit from Tony’s favorite “Aunt Mary Yew” and we ended up being out until 9 or 10. He had a blast all night, since he then had Aunt Gee to Power Ranger with.
Aunt Gee Won This Round
Tony Has Avenged His Own Death!
(They took turns “getting dead”.)
But getting him to bed that night was a nightmare. And he was up twice over night and then was quite the difficult child the next morning.
Friday night, we had a family movie night with Captain America.
That Baby Bogarted All the Popcorns.
And going to bedthat night was also insane.
Saturday, there was no nap. (For myself and the boys. Bryan got a little shut-eye.) Saturday night, we decided to visit the new high school of my alma mater and see Oliver!
They Can’t Dance or The Breakfast Club 2012
Which was a total nightmare. Tony had meltdowns in the following locations: at home before leaving, at dinner, in the lobby, in the balcony alcove, in the lobby AGAIN during intermission, and one more during the second act before he finally passed out on my lap.
.. Sunday was much of the same.
“Out of sorts” is just about right. He just has trouble dealing with things that are maybe unexpected to him. Or things that he didn’t do yesterday. And I guess I’m just supposed to keep going this route? Where we do new stuff just because? BUT THE MELTDOWNS. Oh, they are awful. And honestly, they’re just not like him.
Our city does amazing, free, outdoor summer activities that are evening-based, and I’m thinking we need to do ALL of them. Even if it sucks. Because life isn’t exactly routine, right?
Regardless, we got two great shots yesterday in between the crying spasms:
Look at Dem Purty Boys
Aaaaand the Truth Comes Out.
Tony sounds a lot like my Caroline in this regard (dude, if something out of the ordinary is coming up you have to give her mucho advance notice and then it might still be Katy-bar-the-door), but I’ve found that when she’s acting out like you describe, it’s usually because she’s exhausted. It might not be that he’s not digging the new routines, but it’s just because he’s not getting the sleep he’s used to getting. I swear, if I could get an IEP that would require the school to give Caroline a nap, I so would.
Leandra wants you to read ..We Are Nothing If Not Practical.
Abby was the same way. When she was 4, I had the audacity to back into the driveway instead of pulling in and she lost her sh*t. That taught me that I have to not let her get in such a routine so I started mixing this up for her. We would take different routes when we would go places, do things out of order from the usual, etc. Now she’s the most flexible 12 year old I know.
some kids are just that way…mine were 17 months apart and one was all about the routine and one could care less, just rolled with it. still that way 20+ years later… I doubt it’s being ‘that parent” LOL ya do what you can to adjust and go on… cute kid deserves the popcorn
Matilda is nearly 6 and we only now are breaking her bedtime routine once in awhile with any sort of success. We still mostly live and die buy her 8:00 bedtime. In fact, I’m giddy with excitement that we’re going to attempt a drive-in movie on Saturday night…it STARTS at 9:30. I think she can handle it now – fingers crosse that we aren’t hating ourselves on Sunday.
kakaty wants you to read ..Weekend Round Up – Just Add Water Edition (Giveaway)
Scott is the king of routine, so I am the agent of chaos around here.
Boy child was having meltdowns at that age, too, if we let him get into a routine but then something changed. So I worked more on having a “framework”: lunch can happen from 11 a.m. to 1 p.m.; naps might or might not happen. He’s now rather flexible, considering he does take after his dad.
We did try to keep our evenings early, because there is nothing you can do with a sleepy & cranky kid 20 minutes away from his bed. But we have that option, while you don’t. Just hold the course, and be willing to call it an early evening now & then.
As for school, well, I have no clue. The boy has always gone to schools where the teachers have been trained to help kids who have “transition issues.” He had a great year at Montessori and now is thriving at Challenger Elementary.
And yet, your kid makes his own bed! gets dressed! brushes his teeth! goes to bed right at 8 p.m.! without drama!!!!!
Man, I wish my kid was just a little bit ruined………..
Um. Hello? The apple does not fall far from the tree….