Didn’t you hate that saying when you were little? Dude, it didn’t matter what the circumstance was, I inevitably chimed a big ole NUH-UH in my head whenever that was spoken to me. I’M THE ONE BEING PUNISHED. HOW COULD IT POSSIBLY HURT YOU MORE?
We’re at a fun age with Tony. He’s three and some change (wait .. crap, he’s now three and a half .. I didn’t realize it was JUNE already), so there’s a lot of quirky, fun, imaginative stuff that is a lot of fun about this age.
Jesus, kid, could you pick better battles?
For instance: food. I am SO AT MY WITS’ END over food. The child never wants to eat. Ever. EVER. He may snack a bit here and there, but a meal? OH HELL NO YOU CAN’T MAKE ME. I don’t get it. He asked for pizza the other night. Did he eat a single bite? No. The closest thing to a success I’ve had is homemade stroganoff (and it WAS mighty yummy), and because I called it “Kung Fu Panda Noodles”. I BRANDED MY FOOD. And he ate a lot of “noodles” and asked for more. And ate leftovers later. But that is my ONLY success, and all Kung Fu Panda eats is noodles.
Another battle: backtalk. And this is hard for me, you know? We are a quippy, sarcastic household. We value wit and quick-thinking. So what’s to say that “You’re kiyyin me, smaaz!” is less sassy than “Momma, I TOLD YOU SO”? Yeah, I don’t know. Because I laugh at the former and time-out for the latter. So we constantly battle over this.
And what really grinds my gears is that I’ll make threats and THEN HAVE TO FOLLOW THROUGH ON THEM. Do you know how much fun stuff I’VE had to miss out on because he’s called my bluff? TONS. Kid, Momma likes to do stuff too. And yet you’re being an asshat, and I cannot take an asshat anywhere.
We missed Kung Fu Panda 2 because he wouldn’t put his shorts on. REALLY? You felt THIS was a stand worth making?
We missed yesterday’s Art Stroll and BBQ because he wouldn’t take ONE bite of his dinner. ONE BITE, KID. Just chew and swallow. Then we could have HOURS of fun!
We don’t spank in my house (no judgement if you do in yours, but we have enough issues with him being physically bullied), but .. part of me wishes we did. Because then the spanking could just be over and we could go do all the fun stuff I’d like Tony to remember about his childhood. I feel like this stupid parenting and stupid disciplining is keeping Tony from having childhood memories.
Because it is CERTAINLY putting a cramp on my style.