The Trip, 2009

We started a couple of days ago, knowing that we wanted the weekend to include The Trip.  Parents know The Trip, because it plagues all of our holidays.  Sure, your holiday card is going to include some precious posed shots of autumnal y’all, but you still have to get the ONE pic of your kid(s) with Santa.  Otherwise known as The Trip.

Tony went and saw Santa when he was a mere two/three weeks old, and he handled the entire shoot like a pro:

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See?  GREAT picture there.  Santa was happy, we were happy, everyone was happy.  CHRISTMAS MIRACLE.

Last year was HELLISH in the First Birthday party and then we had, I dunno, other shit to do and we totally missed The Trip.  Which we were okay with, because we only had EIGHTY MILLION PICTURES of the child at that point.

So this year was our first venture back.  And we started early with the propaganda.

We started pointing out pictures of Santa first.  We taught Tony what Santa says, which was always repeated as, “Hooo Hoh Hoooo”, as if he was some WereSanta or something.  I don’t know; the child is a genius in his own mind.  We talked about it for DAYS, going to visit Santa Clause.  We practiced what we were going to ask for (“bakketbawl?”) and all of that crap.  Dude, we had this NAILED.

We went to the mall midday on a Sunday, knowing the crowds would be light.  Tony’s face LIT UP when we saw him, seated there in his plush purple wingback.  “Oooooh!” he said.  That’s Santa, I told him.  He brings you stuff. “DANTA!!” he squealed.

We waited in line about ten minutes, which?  No big whoop.  Tony watched, bright-eyed and smiling as the children in front of us took their perfect pictures.  He kept pulling to enter the sacred Santa area.  “Not our turn yet, bud,” I’d warn.  “Just a minute.”

“MENOWT.” he said, impatient.  Christmas is COMING, Mom.

“What does Santa say?” I said, trying to pass the time.

“Hooo hoh hooooo,” he’d answer.

Finally, the other children cleared the path.  Santa smiled his jolly smile at Tony and said, “Hey.”

AND TONY WENT APESHIT.

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This?  Was the BEST SHOT.  We literally had to throw Tony into the frame from a good two feet in front of the SATANIC SANTA and pray that maybe he wasn’t yowling that very second.  It was an .. experience.  It was .. The Trip.

Later tonight, when we were loading up from grocery shopping, I asked Tony if he’d gone to see Santa Clause today.  His eyes got wide as he nodded.  “.. yeeaaah..”

“And what did he say?” I asked.

He leaned in really close to me and said, “RAWR.”

Well, I’d have gone apeshit too.

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10 Responses to The Trip, 2009

  1. stephanie November 29, 2009 at 8:21 pm #

    OMG. I’m crying I’m laughing so hard. I think you should send this picture to failblog.

  2. montysano November 29, 2009 at 9:42 pm #

    MENOWT!11 should have been your warning sign.

    Great writing, too. Also.

  3. Delle November 29, 2009 at 10:00 pm #

    CUTE sweater though! Silver Lining;)

  4. Sarah November 29, 2009 at 10:03 pm #

    Oh gosh. Maybe somehow you could get a grandparent or someone to take him on like, a Monday morning and be the first ones there. If there is no line maybe you could warm him up to it. Have you seen Lisa Watring’s picture of Maggie Grace with Santa on FB? It’s hysterical.

  5. Jen November 29, 2009 at 11:23 pm #

    That is fantastic. Classic!

  6. Elaine P November 29, 2009 at 11:28 pm #

    Helen’s last picture with Santa was when she was 3. And that’s only because Jeff White photoshopped him into the picture.

    You know. Because Gary Knight is terrifying. Alice has had exactly one photo with Santa, and she was NOT HAPPY ABOUT IT.

    So we gave up.

  7. bessie.viola November 30, 2009 at 2:18 pm #

    Oh, I cannot stop laughing at this. We haven’t yet attempted The Trip, and I’m pretty sure we won’t this year, either. Random strangers are already greeted with a “NO!” and a hand in the face, so Santa? Hmm…

    He is still adorable, howling or no. :)
    .-= bessie.viola´s last blog ..quirky is just a nicer way to say “weird” =-.

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