Hi. Remember Me?

Wow.  I feel like a stranger here.  It’s been, what, a week?  Since I’ve talked to you people?  I KNOW, RIGHT?!  You’ve probably been in the throes of desparation without my snarkiness.  I know.  Let me calm you.

I have been writing about four posts in my head all week.  But when it came down to it, I just COULDN’T make myself sit down and type them out.  It was, like, writer’s block.  Of the blog kind.  Which is not as meaningful or as deprivating.  One of them was an outraged post over the stupid backlash of the mommyblogger world when some were featured on Oprah.  The next was a post inspired by that same mommyblogger world and how a net of people who had never met eachother came together over one little girl and did amazing things.  The third post was a list of things that I’ve bought lately that I wanted to share with you.  And the fourth post was to talk about how I’m uncool because I don’t think 30Rock deserves all of the praise it receives, especially since The Office is just so consistently better.

I still plan to write all of these posts (especially since tomorrow is Maddie’s Day), but first, I wanted to share some bullets with you.  I’m a bullet kind of gal today.  It’s really all I can muster.

• So my sister wore this incredibly cute shirt yesterday and I was all, “Hey, where’d you get that?” and she was all, “Forever 21 online.” and I told Bryan that I wanted to buy that shirt but in a normal people’s size and I jump on there today to check it out and OHMYGOD BRYAN WE MAY HAVE TO TAKE OUT A SMALL LOAN BECAUSE I LOVE THAT SITE SO MUCH I WOULD MAKE OUT WITH IT. *WITH TONGUE*.
• I’m sure it was a fluke, but I weighed myself yesterday and I’LL BE GAWDDAMNED, I weighed in at 158.  I haven’t seen the 150s since before I got married.
• And it may not be a fluke, because I’m actually participating in AndreAnna’s 30 Initiative, where you have to make yourself be active for 30 minutes a day.  To accomplish some of that, I’ve also been training for a 5k by using the Couch-to-5k program.  I?  Am not a runner.  But I am doing this.  I’m doing it successfully, actually.  There is a C25K iPhone app that I highly recommend, and it makes short work of running 5k.
• I auditioned and got a part in a local (outdoor!) production of Shakespeare’s Merry Wives of Windsor.  I’m very excited because 1) this is my first venture into Shakespeare and 2) the other wife is none other than Stephanie, the Hairless Wonder.  This makes everything about the show totally amazing.  The cast is all around great, and it’s been a pleasure thus far.  Can’t wait to spend my evenings up on the mountain.
• My child is a genius.  He had his mouth full and kept trying to say something and I finally just whined, “I can’t UNDERSTAND what you’re saying,” and you know what he did?  That baby Einstein did the sign for “All Done”.  I KNOW.  I ordered his Mensa application kit this morning.
• This will be the photo I submit with his application.

And now, a quick summation of TV I’ve watched in the last week and meant to tell you about but didn’t blog so here’s another list:

• RHoNY – Kelly is such a horrible awful person.  I’ll say it.  I’ll say she looks like a man.  She has weird skin tanning issues.  And her freak out on Bethenny?  Um, CUHRAZY.  With a capital UNSTABLE.
• Fringe is back on!  Walter’s back!  And the last episode made me BAWL.
• Oh, and American Idol?  You quit fucking around with my TiVo’s recording of Fringe. Your fifteen minute montages of losers cuts into MY show EVERY SINGLE TIME IT RECORDS WHICH IS EXACTLY ONCE, but you’re on notice.
• Rock of Love Tour Bus (no spoilers here): WHAT IS UP WITH MINDY’S HAIR?  She has perfectly fine hair, which she proceeds to mouse up by sticking her finger in a socket before every date with Brett.  Honestly, I wrote her off because of that and because her lack of moustache attention until the finale.
• Toddlers & Tiaras .. it is now my life’s obsession to know someone who has competed in the Chittlin’ Strut of South Carolina.  It may make my 2009 resolutions.
• I have decided that my wedding caterer WASN’T awful.  I just chose to have a Hell’s Kitchen themed sit-down dinner.

So .. world.. what have y’all been up to?