I appreciate everyone’s support on my last post.  I walked around for the remainder of my workday yesterday just pissed off to high hell because of being made to feel like I’m crazy for insisting my child get treatment.  When I got to work, one of my coworkers shook his head and said, “First time mom stress syndrome.”

Trying to be tactful, I got out through clenched teeth, “NO, ANY TIME MOM STRESS SYNDROME.”

He repeated himself, and luckily, another (male, surprisingly) coworker stepped in and avoided me from tackling him and said, “Man, you should go home and kiss the ground your wife walks on for keeping you ignorant of the stress a mom, regardless of number of children, goes through.”

***

Never thought it would happen, but I am officially denouncing a reality tv show.  I Know My Kid’s a Star on VH1 had such potential, featuring slightly talented kids (seriously, I only think maybe two of them had genuine potential) and CUH-RAZY parents.  Obviously, the nutty wackjob parental units are what are the most fun to watch, but it’s taken a turn for the worse.  Because “Rocky”, the insane he/she parent who last night said she had no weave in her head only clip on pieces which are not weave (THEY ARE!  TOTALLY WEAVE, SHIM!), is such fantastic tv, Bonaduce is sending home other kids in order to keep her around.  This is NOT FAIR.  Last night is a perfect example.  The kids paired up to a screen-test of a scene.  The kid paired up with Rocky’s kid (who is honestly so useless to anyone that I don’t even know her name) learned his lines, rehearsed his blocking, and even tried to help Rocky’s daughter.  But Rocky’s daughter?  Didn’t learn a damn line.  And while film was rolling, just looked around, saying, “I don’t know these lines.  Something about a brother, maybe?”

They ended up?  Sending the OTHER kid home.  The kid who learned his lines.  The kid who kept going when his partner was a total fucktard. (Am I going to hell?  For calling a kid a fucktard?) All because Rocky makes for such fabulous tv.

It’s not fair.  And it’s painful to watch children’s dreams be crushed over ratings.

(Sarah is currently struggling to type “So I’m not going to watch it anymore”.  Because we all know SHE WILL.  She’ll just bitch about it as it airs.)

***

Cheetos?  Should be a food group.

***

Last night TOTALLY rocked my world.  We had a celebration dinner for the arrival of Ra’s newest princess, Penelope, and it was SO. MUCH. FUN.  Why do we only meet once a month, people?  We are such awesome, fabulous women!  And humble, let’s not forget how humble we are about our perfection.

The only part that sucked about dinner is that there is not a round table large enough to seat all of us, so we don’t all get to mingle.  So to Terri, Ninã, Kari, Amy, Alison, and Caroline: I love you and I’m sorry we didn’t get to talk more.  I hope y’all talked about blow jobs as much as we did.

***

Because why segue from blow jobs to a deathly ill cat?

Friday, our remaining feline who has yet to crawl under a neighbor’s house and die, went APESHIT when Bryan left town.  At first, I thought he was just annoying.. he’s been a tad clingy since Shelby left, and with Bryan gone too, it made sense.  But then I realized that he wasn’t in his right mind.  At all.  He wandered the house, the yard, and the street YOWLING.  Every 1.9 seconds.  And even stranger, he felt the need to knock everything off of every shelf in the house.  I came home yesterday to find our bottle-drying rack (complete with nipples, collars, and bodies for 8 bottles) sitting in the middle of the sink.  He opened the dishwasher, went swimming in the toilet.. was just generally weird. 

Which, you know, in my totally compassionate way, made me suggest that it was his time.

I said this because I really didn’t think it was.

But Bryan took him to the vet this morning and sure enough, Friday’s got an enlarged heart.  It’s something that’s potentially manageable, with a diet restriction and daily meds.  We’ll see if he improves in two weeks.

But yeah, I did feel bad for two seconds about mocking the cat’s health.

***

I think we’re planning on making an offer on a house.  I hope to have that finalized for you by Monday.  Because what an AWESOME way to start a week, eh?