There are a lot of times when I become overwhelmed.  Work has picked up tremendously, which is good.. but stressful and tiring nonetheless.  I miss being onstage, which will hit me hard on weeknights.  I’ll talk to friends who are traveling and having a merry town, and I suddenly feel very old.

It never ever fails that just when I start to feel down or overwhelmed, I will receive a swift kick in the uterus.  It’s softer than a kick in the ass, but twice as powerful.  It reminds me that everything happens for a reason, and that my reason grows daily. 

I read this the other day:

Jealousy is all the fun that you think they had.

And it’s true.  I’m jealous of things I think I’m missing out on.  But then he’ll cartwheel in my ribs, and I’ll be so happy that he’s there.  That this thing whose existence I doubted now keeps me moving .. that’s so amazing.  And he’s coming into a home and a village filled with so much love and happiness.

He reminds me, several times a day, that I have nothing to ever be jealous of.  He, his father, and I have all that we could ever need.