There are words that you don’t know until you’re pregnant. Because I’ve sworn to be waaaay too informative about pregnancy and all the joys, I will give you a glimpse inside this secret, and often unappetizing, world.
snail trail - n. I can’t even take credit for this one; it’s from Jenny McCarthy’s Belly Laughs. Pregnancy means you produce more of EVERYTHING, including vaginal secretions. The snail trail appears in your panties.
urpy - adj. when you are on the verge of vomiting, but saying the actual word “vomit” might actually induce the puking, urpy may describe what you’re feeling.
swussy - n. from the english words “sweaty” and “pussy”, the swussy is what you get when you walk to your office from your car in midday heat.
What am I forgetting?
Vericose Veins…now, you’ve heard of them, but when they invade the Vulva, that’s pregnancy.
Mucus Plug…’nough said.
FUNDUS. That’s a favorite of mine. As in, “Excuse me, I must massage my fundus.”
I was always fond of the painful-achy hybrid “pacheful” - as in, boy my hips/back/feet are really pacheful today.
Dangit! Bryan beat me to Mucus Plug!!
I have to admit that swussy had me laughing pretty damn hard…
Then you may use Bryan’s version: “swenis”. Or if it’s REALLY bad, “swaint”.